So the point of this is to keep myself sane and on track with something. I won't be unlrealistic and hope to be on track with "everything" but something would be helpful. My life the past few years has been...insert adjective here...and it is time to take care of myself. Whatever that means. Writing my thoughts down has been beneficial in the past and I'm hoping it will prove to be again. It's time to figure out what taking care of myself means.

At the moment, that means throwing plans past a three month span out the window. I'm finally comfortable living life in the slow-er lane anyway. No more fast track to disaster for me. This makes me smile. Huge stress release. Someone please explain the point of planning to me anyway. I think it's out of fear for the unknown. Bring in on baby. I don't know a damn thing to begin with so lets not even try to pretend. Time to flow with it.

I am rambling but I don't care. This is for me and rambling works for this entry as I have too much to say to focus. I hate filtering myself. This blog will be my free write. Please enjoy.

Topic for today: Emotional eating.

This is a bad bad habit that I must kick! This habit is actually what brought me to this site to begin typing. I plan (ahaha) to use this to help keep myself focused on following a healthy lifestyle. With my various issues there are plenty of reasons to eat better. The top two are as follows:

1.) Hypoglycemic
2.) Peptic Ulcer

When I eat like shit I feel the following:

1.) Poor self image
2.) Lack of self control
3.) Sick

Ridiculous. It's stupid. It's time to change. It does not make any sense to celebrate by making myself feel bad about my body and determination. It doesn't make sense to eat like crap and further negative feelings when I've had a bad day. Why on earth would anyone ever eat emotionally? No logical sense. Hence "emotional," I suppose. Well I'm here to take care of me. When I want to eat emotionally, whether it be because I'm happy, sad, frustrated, bored or whatever, I will write about my feelings instead and do something to better myself rather than destroy myself. This is a beginning. That I do know.

As I said, it is time...Simba. Let's do itttt.